Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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