we're blogging at a bar
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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