I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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