someone threw a dead crab at me
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
