I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
