Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize