In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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