How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
