speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
