I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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