I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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