So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
