He kissed a someone with a penis
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
