At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
