fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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