Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
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It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
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Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
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