I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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