My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
