i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
