her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
