Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
