remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
