Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
