Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Someone shattered a urinal.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
