The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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