Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
