no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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