Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
