I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
