nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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