He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
