If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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