Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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