It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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