Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
