how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
