That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
