I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
