You work out of a Hotel?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
We left the knife in your bed.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
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