just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize