Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
