you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
