Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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