AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
