I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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