Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
