oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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