I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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