East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
