So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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