marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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